The only blogs I’ve published in the last few weeks have been ones that were already written and scheduled. I haven’t written anything new, or actively pushed those blog posts, I’ve been rubbish on twitter and I’ve changed how I Instagram and it’s all for one reason. It was already taking over.
I started blogging back in February as somewhere to put my photography. I eventually turned it into a general blog because I didn’t always have the time to go out and take all new photos for a blog post each day, or the photos I did have I was comparing with other people and just putting myself down. And so SimplySophie was born, somewhere to just put my thoughts and have a corner of the internet to call my own. I was then pushing myself to put out a blog post at least every other day (props to those of you who do a post every day, HOW you do that and stay sane is anyone’s guess!) The thing with that wasn’t just creating the content, it was doing the photos, publishing and pushing it on social media. The notes section on my phone was turning into an absolute library of blog posts that I wasn’t sure what to do with. My Instagram and twitter became some weird pages that weren’t ‘me.’ I was using hashtags I would never normally use, but they were getting my profile noticed and the likes were creeping up, along with the followers. I was constantly checking my phone on stats, likes and followers and it was making me miserable. I was comparing myself to people who’d been blogging for years for God’s sake! I became obsessed with getting the number up and it was a passing comment that made me stop. We were out for dinner with friends and I instagrammed a picture of my espresso martini and then added in all the unnecessary hashtags. Later on when I checked my page, that picture had suddenly got 173 likes from nowhere. Now I know to most bloggers they would class that as a rubbish amount, but I had never really pushed my pictures before so that amount was good for me! I mentioned it and my friend made the most simple comment that really struck me….
Pfft I’m just trying to get to 100 followers!
That one comment made me rethink it all. He didn’t mean it as a dig, it was meant as a joke but it made me think why am I stressing over the layout of my pictures, why am I getting bothered about NUMBERS on a screen?! Yes those numbers represent people, but are they people I know, or do they actually care about the picture? Chances are….no. I was stressing out over what hashtags to use, following people who’s accounts didn’t actually interest me or I had only followed because “all the other bloggers did” and every day was just scrolling past their pictures until I found something that did catch my interest. My own social media accounts were becoming strangers to me. So I stopped with the hashtags, with pushing my blog, I took some time out and didn’t write any fresh posts…..my Instagram numbers went down by 40 pretty much overnight, then a few more, then my Twitter followers dropped. And I genuinely didn’t care this time. Before when my numbers dropped it bugged the hell out of me and I was on a mission to get them back up, now I laughed at how “old Sophie” would have reacted and carried on posting pictures of things I actually cared about that weren’t cliche blogger.
So I took some time away from my blog, letting those scheduled posts go out with no promotions or interactions and let the scheduled number dwindle down before realising I’d invested too much time into my blog to just give up. I spoke to the lovely nyxierose a lot and realised it wasn’t just me, there’s an insane amount of pressure on blogging, to keep yourself up to scratch and on top of posts. I won’t purchase a domain name, I don’t invest enough into my blog to justify it, I’ll stick to my little WordPress layout with it’s free design and just blog away. Even if I get no views or bloglovin clicks, I’ll write for myself. And I feel so much better for it!